Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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