"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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