Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
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