is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
