yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
