Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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