i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Pants are for mortals
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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