before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
Randomize
