so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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