wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
