Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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