I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
