idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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