Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
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