Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
