k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
