ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
She announced her abortion via fbk
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
