I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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