I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
