Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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