After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
