i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
