I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
