ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
