at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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