This is not my ceiling
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
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