Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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