Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
The beers last night were like the tears from god
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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