More tranny stories later!
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
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