is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
This is classic penis vs brain.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
I think i got beer on your cat.
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