your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Randomize
