Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
