I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
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