Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize
