Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
