I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
we should paint friendship bongs
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