she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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