ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
