this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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