in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
