i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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