I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
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