Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
