shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
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