dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
