who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
