The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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