Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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