I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize