I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize
