Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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